If you're in the food industry, and your restaurant, for whatever reason, does not carry ranch, you're doing it wrong.

Today, for lunch, I visited an establishment that I have most recently started going to on a relatively regular basis. It has been quite reliable. It's a sandwich shop that I enjoy each time out. However, it was today that I realized something horrifying about this particular establishment...they do not carry ranch.

What? I was in disbelief. How does a successful sandwich establishment not carry ranch dressing? I am still in awe just typing this. I don't know that I've ever confidently gone to a sandwich shop anywhere that didn't carry ranch. I mean, how does that happen? My shock was so severe, it was as if I had visited a burger joint that didn't carry ketchup.

Ranch is one of the most amazing inventions to ever be introduced into the condiment world. There are some recipes that are impossible to make without ranch dressing. For instance, the friend I was with at the sandwich establishment today ordered a sandwich with buffalo chicken on it. You would reasonably think that maybe ranch would come on that. However, this is when I found out that they don't carry ranch. Yet, they had blue cheese dressing to "remedy" the situation. No, I don't think so. How do you carry blue cheese dressing, and no ranch? Does that make sense?

I wasn't even getting a sandwich with ranch, nor did I need it at the time. However, there's a level of comfort knowing that it's available, should I ask for some.

Not only that, but here's a list of foods that you can use ranch with, should you choose to: salad, pizza, chips, mozzarella sticks, fries, carrots, broccoli, celery, chicken tenders, chicken wings, any type of chicken really, burgers, quesadillas, tater tots, tacos, SANDWICHES, etc...If I were going to make up an identity, I'd probably say I was running a ranch dressing conglomerate in California somewhere.

I'm not saying there can't be other substitutes for ranch, but it might be the most universally common condiment that I would love to see a food establishment have on hand. I know that I'm not the only one who thinks this way. If you're reading this and you have ever had ranch on anything, you know what I'm saying. In closing, yes, I'd like some ranch with that.